Saving Eric
by H20xSpelboundfanx
Summary: "Adopted From arianna532" Jenny doesn't reveal her secret during Easy J, Eric does. When Chuck confronts Eric about what he did, he discovers something Eric has been keeping a secret for a while. Will Chuck be able to save Eric before its too late?
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl_

 _In my version Jenny didn't spill the secret about Chuck sleeping with her on Gossip Girl. She left for Hudson right after her interview failed because she didn't want to fight with Blair and Chuck. But Eric did._

We're Not Related

 _Looks like New York's best kept secret is finally out. Turns out Little J didn't lose her V-card to Damien. She waited. And Chucked it away with her step-brother. Guess that explains the Humphrey in Hudson. Hell hath no fury like a Waldorf scorned._

Chuck stared at his phone in shock. How had this happened. Jenny had left town earlier that day after Chuck had told her about his plan to mess with Blair and had agreed to arrange for another interview to thank her. One outside of Manhattan of course. But then who sent the blast? Everyone at the party began to stare at him. He searched through the party for Blair but he needn't have worried. As soon as she read the message she was by his side.

"Did you send this?" Blair asked furious.

"Yes, Blair," Chuck said sarcastically, "I wanted all of Manhattan to know I slept with my step-sister."

"Well if you didn't then Little J must have."

"No she wouldn't have, I just set her up with a new interview. She's crazy, but not stupid."

"Well them who did?"

Just then Eric made his way towards them with a smirk on his face. Chuck and Blair turned to him. "Eric, did you see this?" Blair asked him.

"Yep" he responded.

"Did Jenny send this?" Chuck asked.

"Nope."

"Well do you know who did E?" Blair asked.

"I did," he stated then turned and walked away leaving Blair and Chuck in shock.

Chuck turned to Blair, "I'll go after him. See if I can figure anything out." Blair just nodded, in shock.

Chuck ran after Eric and caught him in the lobby. Eric saw him and made to leave the building, but Chuck grabbed him arm and pulled him into an empty conference room to the left.  
"Let me go Chuck!" Eric growled.

"Eric, we need to talk." Chuck said.

"I have nothing to say to you." Eric spat.

"Well I sure have something to say to you. Like why would you send that to Gossip Girl? E, what the hell?"

"It's not like I said anything not true. You screwed my sister then used her to get back at Blair. You and Blair have had it coming for a long time," Eric looked Chuck directly in the face and for once Chuck was speechless, "You're just a basstard."

"Eric. Jenny's fine. I booked her another interview and she's perfectly fine."

"Oh yeah. You use her then give her some consolation prize."

"I am sorry about what happened. I've said this before."

"You can't just do this to people! To my family!" Eric practically shouted at him.

"Eric, in case you've forgotten I'm your family too."

"Chuck, when are you going to get it? We're not related." Eric flung his words back at him with such fury Chuck was shocked. Eric had obviously been carrying that around for a while. "You can just play around with people and them drop them when you get bored."

Chuck paused, "Eric, were you trying to get me back for what I did to Jenny or for what I did to you?"

"I don't know what you mean Chuck." Eric said.

"Stop playing dumb E. You're still mad at me for two years ago aren't you?

"Well so what if I am?" Eric yelled, "You mess around with me for a year, then you get mad and decide what? That you hate me? Then you go and make up with my mom, my sister, but conveniently forget I exist. And you expect me not to be mad?"

"Eric, I..." Chuck started, then stopped not knowing what to say.

"You what, Chuck?"

"I'm sorry, Eric. I didn't mean to forget you."

"But what? You just conveniently did?" Eric said sarcastically. Eric turned to leave.

"Eric wait!" Chuck screamed after him.

"No. I waited long enough for you already."


	2. Chapter 2

Save Your Lies

Chuck was stunned. He couldn't believe that Eric could be so angry at him. Well maybe he should have seen it coming. It's just he never imagined he could hurt Eric so much.

"Chuck!" Chuck turned his head to see Blair coming into the room.

"I was looking everywhere for you. Where'd you go? Where's Eric"

Chuck took a deep breath, "Eric was a little mad at me. It's all taken care of."

Blair was confused, "Wait what happened?"

"Eric was mad about what happened with Jenny and wanted to get me back." Chuck said He wasn't sure why he wasn't telling Blair what was going on, but he had sensed something off about Eric. He had spent a lot of time with him and he could tell Eric wasn't just mad at him. There was more, but he couldn't seem to figure out what.

Before Blair could respond, Dan came into the room. "Chuck, Blair, where's Eric?" he said accusingly.

"Calm down, Humphrey. Eric's fine. He went home." Chuck said tiredly.

"What the hell were you thinking Humphrey? Dragging Eric into your pathetic scheme to help your sister? Leave him out of it!" Blair snarled.

"It wasn't..." Dan started but Chuck interrupted

"It wasn't his fault." Blair gaped at him. "Know if you both don't mind I'm going to go find my little brother." It had been the first time in a while that Chuck had referred to Eric as such, but he knew it was true. No matter what Eric was his little brother, and as such it was his job to protect him.

He walked away from the two gaping people in the room and got into his limo. He directed the driver to the Van der Woodsen penthouse.

Eric was furious. Who the hell did Chuck think he was anyway? That he could do that to him! To Jenny! To everyone Eric loved! Eric punched the counter in fury. Sharp pain shot through Eric's hand causing him to howl. Bleed started to cover his hand, so he went to the bathroom to whip it off.

Eric searched through the cabinets trying to find a bandage when he happened upon his old blade. Without thinking he picked up the blade, rolled up his shirt sleeve and made a little cut. Eric winced at the pain and curled up against the bathroom wall where he made another cut.

Eric wasn't sure exactly when he had gotten back into this old habit. I might have been after Jenny dumped the yogurt on his head, or when Jonathan dumped him, or when Jenny left town. But if he was honest with himself, which he refused to be, He knew it was when Chuck disowned him that he started up again. He was back exactly where he was four years ago. No friends, no family, all alone. So he picked up the knife and cut again.

When he got out of the elevator Eric was no where in sight. Chuck opened the door to Eric's room, but there was no one in sight. Chuck was just wondering where Eric might be when he heard a moan coming from the bathroom.

Chuck slowly pushed open the door and was not prepared for the sight which greeted him. Eric was curled up on the floor, blade in hand, making a cut across his already scarred arm.

Without even thinking Chuck crossed the room and grabbed the blade out of Eric's hand. When Eric looked up and saw Chuck standing over him he scramble to his feet, which was made difficult by his bleeding arm.

"Chuck! What are you doing here!"

"No Eric. The real question is what the hell are you doing!" Chuck yelled. Eric was surprised . He had never seen Chuck so furious.

"I...I...I..." Eric stuttered, not knowing what to say.

Chuck grabbed Eric's arm to examine it. He was shocked at what he found there. Layer upon layer of cuts and scars some fresh, some looked to be years old. He grabbed Eric's other arm and pulled back the sleeve, preparing himself for the worst. The other arm was in the same condition as the first minus the fresh cuts, it looked as if Eric had only cut one arm so far.

"Eric," Chuck said, softer than the first time, "What have you done?"

"Nothing Chuck! Let go!" With that Eric yanked his arms out of Chuck's hands.

"Chuck! Leave! Go away and don't come back!" Eric yelled. He needed Chuck to get out of there. No one could know what he did. Especially not Chuck.

Chuck ignored him. He grabbed the bandages out of the cabinet and began to bandage Eric's arm. At first Eric struggled but after Chuck gave him a stern look he gave up and let Chuck finish.

As soon as he was done Chuck opened the door to the bathroom. "Come on, Eric."

Eric sat down again and refused to move.

"Eric. Come. Now." Eric still refused to move. Unwilling to wait any longer, Chuck bent down and picked Eric up. Eric began to squirm and kick and hit at Chuck, but Chuck ignored him and carried Eric back into his room. He lay Eric down on his bed and sat next to him.

"Okay, Eric. Talk. I want to know everything." Chuck said.

"I don't need to tell you anything!" Eric spat.

"Well," Chuck said, "I'd talk if I were you. I'm sure you wouldn't want me going to Lily or Rufus or Serena now would you? I'm sure they'd send you right back to Ostroff. Now I'll give you two options. Either talk to me and never do this again or I go call Lily and we can have a little talk."

Eric froze. This was like his own personal hell come to life. "Well Eric? I'm waiting."

Eric sneered, "Well Chuck. That might work. But I kind of doubt they would believe you now would they?"

"Well you _do_ have the marks."

"Yes. But they'll think it was from before Chuck." Eric smirked.

They heard the door open and heard two male voices enter the house.

Eric smirked wider then before, "Let's go find out shall we." And before Chuck could stop him, Eric jumped up and ran out into the hall, making sure to cover his arm first.

Eric spotted Dan and Rufus walk out of the elevator. They saw Eric and immediately rushed over.

"Eric, what's wrong" Rufus asked when he saw the look on Eric's face.

"I think I know," growled Dan as he saw Chuck appear in the hall.

"He won't...go away..." Eric pretended to sob, "He said...I better stop trying to help Jenny or he'll turn everyone against me...he...he" Eric admired his genius. Now that he'd planted that seed of doubt in their minds, they would never expect Chuck was telling the truth.

Rufus glared at Chuck, "I think you should leave. Now."

"Look," Chuck tried to say, "Eric is lying. I never said any of that."

Dan snorted, "So what? Eric just made it up?"

"Yes!" Chuck said.

Just then, Lily walked through the door. She look for Dan and Rufus's angry faces to Chuck indignant face and finally settled on her son's tear-streaked face. She ran over to Eric. "Eric, darling what's wrong? Rufus what is going on?"

"Chuck was harassing Eric," Dan answered.

Lily looked surprised, "What? Why? Charles would never do that!"

"I didn't, Lily, No one them will hear me out." Chuck tried to explain.

"Well by all means, Charles, explain." Lily said.

"Eric made that up."

Lily was confused, "Why would he do that?"

"I wouldn't!" Eric yelled, "Chuck's made because I sent put the Gossip Girl blast. He said he's going to ruin my life.

"No," Chuck interrupted, "I walked into the house and came across Eric cutting himself. He's trying to get you to believe him over me. Check his arm."

Lily grabbed Eric's right arm and pulled back the sleeve. "Charles, all there is is old scars from years ago."

"It's the other arm, Lily."

"Look," Rufus cut in, "Stop putting Eric through this. Chuck is making this up to get back at Eric."

"It's not true." Eric sobbed.

"I know, Eric" Rufus said as he put an arm around Eric's shoulders. "Come on. Let's get you out of here." He lead Eric out of the room.

When they were gone Lily spoke again, "Chuck is what you said true?"

Before he could answer Dan spoke up, "Of course not, Lily. Chuck just wanted revenge so badly he would hurt Eric."

That got Chuck mad, "Humphrey, you know nothing. I would never hurt Eric. I love him!"

"Well you sure have a funny way of showing it." Dan shot back.

"Boys!" Lily yelled, "I don't know what's going on, and I don't want to. But this is your fight and I want you to leave Eric out of it. Both of you." With that Lily turned and left.

"Chuck. Leave Eric alone! Don't ever come near him again. If Eric ever says anything about you trying to hurt him, you will pay."

Chuck smirked, "How will you do that Humphrey? And yes Eric will probably complain. He won't stop until I leave him to hurt himself in peace. And I won't. Eric is mentally unstable. He will try to make sure that you never find out and it will kill him. He will lie to everyone. If t had been you who found him, he would have said the same thing about you."

"Just save your lies for someone who believes them." Dan said and he too left Chuck standing alone.

 **Authors note: Thanks to everyone who is already reading! You all rock! And if anyone has any ideas for the story I'm all ears. In my story I wanted to give Eric a badder side. He's a little too good in my opinion. Review!**

 **-Lydia**


	3. Chapter 3

` _Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl, Chuck or Eric. But I wish I did!_

Nate's Good Intentions

"So, are you sure about Eric?" Nate asked.

"I'm positive, Nathaniel," Chuck answered again tired. Nate had been asking that over and over and Chuck was tired of hearing that question.

"But why? Why would Eric do something like that?" Nate asked trying to make sense of it. He'd known Eric as long as Chuck. Maybe even longer. Sure he wasn't as close, but her still cared for Eric and didn't want him to get hurt.

"I don't know. He was talking about Jenny and what happened two years ago."

"What do you mean 'what happened last year'? What did happen last year?" Nate asked.

"Do you remember my father's funeral?" Chuck explained, "I told him we weren't related and today he threw my words back at me. I realized I apologized to everyone about that day. Everyone but Eric."

"So now he's cutting himself? Oh my god, Chuck. We have to tell someone!" Nate exclaimed.

"Nathaniel, I tried. Eric told them all I was trying to get him back for the blast about Jenny. Dan believed him and got Lily and Rufus to go along with him."

"Where is Eric right now?" Nate asked.

"Rufus took him to the loft. Why?"

Nate just turned and exited his and Chuck's suite, leaving Chuck yelling his name behind him.

When Nate got out of the cab, he was in front of the Humphrey loft. When he walked into the door he was pleased to see just Eric was there. He knew Dan was in classes and Rufus had a meeting of some sort so he had picked a good time. Eric heard Nate enter so he looked up from his laptop.

"Nate?" Eric said, surprised, "What are you doing here? Are you looking for Dan? If you are, I think he's in class."

"Actually, I'm looking for you, Eric."

Eric looked confused, "Why are you here to see me. I mean, no offense Nate, but we don't really hang out or talk or well anything."

Nate sat down next to Eric, and looked him in the eye, "Eric, look, I talked to Chuck today."

Eric jerked back from Nate. "Whatever Chuck told you it'd not true. He's trying to get me back for the Jenny thing. Don't believe him, Nate."

"Eric," Nate said softly, "I don't want to, but I've known Chuck since I was five, and he was telling the truth. He sounded so scared."

"Nate," Eric started to sound a little panicked, "He's lying. He's Chuck Bass. How can you believe him?"

"Then show me your arm, E." Nate said simply.

Eric jumped off the bed, "No! I don't have to prove anything to you!"

"If you want me to believe you, you kind of do." Nate stood up too and tried to go over to Eric, but Eric jumped away.

"Get away from me!" Eric yelled scared.

"Eric, just tell me the truth then!" Nate demanded,

"I am! Now get away!"

"If you don't show me your arm, I'll know your lying," Nate said.

Eric was full of freaking out, "I'm not Nate! Just leave me alone!"

Using the speed from his years of lacrosse, he grabbed Eric's arm, holding him back. Using his free hand, Nate pulled Eric's sleeve back. Nate nearly went into shock when he saw Eric's sliced-up arm. "Eric. Oh my god! Eric," Nate breathed.

Eric elbowed Nate in the stomach and Nate howled in pain allowed Eric to break free. Eric made to run to the door but Nate grabbed him around the waist held him there while Eric struggled. Nate attempted to calm him down but Eric refused to be calmed.

They were so loud they didn't here Chuck enter the room. "Nathaniel! What the hell are you doing!" Chuck yelled at his best friend, hurrying over to get Eric out of Nate's grasp. Chuck was worried that although Nate's intentions were good, his actions could cause more harm than good.

As soon as Chuck got Eric away from Nate, he ran into Jenny's old room and slammed the door.

Chuck turned to Nate, "What were you thinking?"

"I was just trying to help him." Nate said quietly, regretting his rash actions.

"Fat lot of good you did! You probably traumatized him!" Chuck yelled.

"Look, Chuck. I'm sorry! I'm just trying to help him. I care about him too." Nate said.

Chuck paused, "I know. But would you mind clearing out? I'm going to try to talk to him."

Nate nodded, "Sure. Good luck, Chuck. Tell Eric I'm sorry about scaring him."

Chuck nodded and Nate left the loft. Chuck went over to Jenny's door and tried to turn the knob. However, it look as if Eric had locked the door. Chuck raised a fist and knocked at the door. "Eric? E, I know you're in there. Please, come out! Nate's gone." Eric didn't reply.

"Eric!" Chuck tried again, "Please open the door! I want to talk to you!" Again Eric didn't reply.

Chuck started to lose his patience, "Eric van der Woodsen! You open this door right now or I swear to god I will knock this goddamn door down!"

"Good luck! Go away, Chuck! I don't want you here!" Eric's voice was muffled behind the door.

Chuck started pounding and kicking at the door but it wouldn't budge. Chuck heard a yell behind him, "What are you doing here!" Chuck turned around and just his luck Dan Humphrey had returned from his class. Dan ran over and pushed him away from the door.

"I told you to stay away! Get away from that door." Dan turned and lightly knocked on the door, "Eric? Eric, its me, Dan. Can you come out, please?" Slowly the door opened and Eric slid out. Eric ran over to Dan who put his arm around Eric and glared at Chuck.

"Eric, why don't you go into Jenny's room. I'll get rid of Chuck."

Eric nodded and went back into Jenny's room.

"Chuck, if you don't get out of here now, I'll call the police."

"Humphrey, you don't understand." Chuck tried to explain.

"No!" Dan yelled at him, "You leave Eric alone! It wasn't his idea. If you want to be mad at anyone, take it out on me!"

"Dan," Chuck said sincerely, "It's not about that. Eric is sick! He's hurting himself and all I want to do is help him. Please!"

"I'm sorry, Chuck. But I just don't trust you." Dan replied.

"Fine," Chuck said pleading, "But can you promise not to let him out of your sight or at least make sure someone is always with him, that he's never alone."

Reluctantly, Dan nodded, "If it will get you to leave him alone."

"Thank you." With that Chuck left, cursing his situation.

 **Here's another Chapter! Give me feedback! Tell me what should happen next! Or in other words Review!**

 **-Lydia**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: STILL don't own Gossip Girl. Anyone want to help me correct that problem?**

You're Nothing

As Chuck had requested, Dan hadn't let Eric out of his sight. It had been a week and Dan was running out of excuses to keep Eric near by. And Eric was noticing. Eric noticed that Dan always had some excuse to be where ever he was. And it made Eric very nervous. He had been so sure that Dan hadn't believed Chuck. But now Eric wasn't so sure. Eric was at his wit's end. He was freaking out and he couldn't use his usual coping mechanisms because Dan was always on his back. Whenever Eric tried to ask Dan about it, Dan just said he wanted to spend time with his little brother. And Eric wasn't stupid. At least Chuck had managed to keep his mouth shut to the rest of the family. Although that made Eric a little nervous too. He wondered what Chuck was planning and with Chuck Bass, he was always planning something.

Finally, Eric couldn't stand it anymore. The uncertainty. The fear. Being watched all the time. He just couldn't take it. They didn't trust him. When Rufus brought them coffee and stopped to talk to Dan, Eric sneaked upstairs into his bathroom and found the razor he had hidden in his bottom drawer. Just one little cut and it would be okay.

When he got back downstairs, Dan looked at him strangely Eric freaked out a little. Had Dan noticed? But when Dan didn't say anything Eric forgot about the whole thing. He was safe.

Eric may have thought Dan hadn't noticed, but Dan very much had. Dan really wanted to believe Eric. It would be so easy. Eric had always been his good little brother, who never did anything bad or manipulative Then there was Chuck Bass, who was evil and scheming and was out to get everyone. If Eric was the one lying, he'd need to redefine everything. And Dan was just not good at that.

Dan looked at Eric. He looked innocent, but if he look closely he could tell Eric looked pale and upset. Eric also kept looking at his arm. That got Dan very suspicious. Dan then did something he thought would get him to the bottom of things. Not because he didn't trust Eric, Dan told himself, but because he wanted to prove Chuck was lying. Dan spilled his coffee on Eric's arm.

"OWWWWW!" Eric howled, clutching his arm.

"Here lemme get that!" Dan said grabbing Eric's arm and attempting to roll his sleeve back. Eric yanked his arm back. "I got it!"

Eric went upstairs, and Dan waited for him to come back downstairs, but he didn't. Finally Dan climbed up and went to Eric's room. Dan knocked on the door. "Eric! Can I come in?" Eric didn't reply so Dan went in anyway. Eric was laying on his bed reading a book.

"What do you want?" Eric asked, not looking up from his book.

Dan sat down next to Eric and took the book out of his hands. "Give it back!" Eric grabbed for the book, but Dan put it down behind him and out of Eric's reach. Eric tried to reach over Dan but Dan grabbed Eric's shoulders and pulled him back.

"I want to talk to you." Dan said, hands still on Eric's shoulders.

"About what? How you don't trust me? I know that's why you did that! I know that's why you've been practically stalking me all week! You believe Chuck don't you?" Eric yanked his shoulders back, "And would everyone STOP GRABBING ME!"

"I believe you, Eric. I will always believe you. I'm always on your side. Any time. Any where. You're my little brother. And I hope you know you can tell me anything. I won't judge you."

Fire appeared in Eric's eyes, "If you believed me, you wouldn't be treating me like this! You wouldn't even consider Chuck being right! And as for trusting you? I don't trust you as far as I can throw you. You act like you're so understanding, but your the most judgmental person I've EVER met. You judge Serena. You judge Jenny. You judge everyone!"

"Eric..." Dan began but Eric cut him off.

"You're not smarter than us! You don't know better than us! You are nothing to us! Nothing to me! You aren't a part of my world! Do you really think I care about you? I'm just bored. I wanted to piss off Chuck, so who better to hang out with than you? And as for Serena! I hope you know she was just dating you to piss off Mom!You embarrass Jenny. She told me so herself! Nate only hangs out with you to make himself feel better! You know how badly he wants out of the Upper East Side. Does that make you mad? He has what you want but is willingly to throw it all away? You are nothing to any of us! So get a clue and stop embarrassing yourself."

"SHUT UP!" Dan yelled and punched Eric in the eye.

When Eric touched his eye in shock, Dan turned his anger on him, "Do you really think you can talk, Little E? Jonathan broke up with you because you're a horrible person. At first I didn't get it but I do now. You stole your best friends boyfriend and Asher didn't even care about you. You sabotaged her at cotillion Yeah I know how you slept with her date. God, no wonder she dumped yogurt on your head. You're the reason she left time. But hey, I heard she has a new boyfriend. Should I get his number for you so you can do him too? Your own father doesn't even want to know you. He didn't even come back after you tried to kill yourself! Serena doesn't give a shit what you do. Chuck left you! He just turned his back on you! I heard he thought it was pathetic, having some little kid following him around."

Eric spat in his face. "Now if you wouldn't mind getting the hell out of my room."

Dan got up and was almost out the door, when he turned to Eric, "No wonder you're so messed up. Chuck can try and fix you, I'm done. You know before I felt sorry for you, but now I feel sorry for him." Dan slammed the door behind him.

Eric laid down on his bed and started to cry.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl**

Facing The Truth

Days passed. They were meaningless. Nothing happened. Nothing ever happened. Eric went through the motions. He woke up, went to school, did his homework, then went to sleep. Nothing else. Everyday was the same. Except when we would cut himself several times as the day progressed. He would not even give his cits a chance to heal before cutting again. One morning, Eric had woken up after a nightmare, so upset he had taken a razor to his arm and hadn't been able to stop until he had cut himself thirty times. He cut in the bathrooms at school, in the back of the limo, in his room, pretty much everywhere. His mother and Rufus were never home and the servants knew better than to comment on Eric's behavoir.

Dan was right. He was a terrible person. He completely screwed Jenny over. He just took everything from her, just to be betrayed in turn. But then again, that's what he got for being such a slut. He had slept with Asher for the first time at fourteen, for God's sake. His own father didn't care about him. He tried to kill himself and still his father stayed away. He had always tried to be storng, to pretend having a father didn't matter to him. But it did. He used to hope his father didn't come back because he didn't know, but Dan forced him to face the truth. His father hadn't cared. His father probally had wished Eric had died. He would have been happier. Serena didn't care about him. Eric had started to wonder whether she had even come back from boarding school for him or just to ease her guilt. Serena never even stopped by to visit anymore. And as for Chuck. He had just screwed everything up with his brother. Once upon a time, Chuck had been everything Eric wanted to be. Chuck was Eric's role model. Chuck was his brother. And he loved Chuck.

Eric started to cry again. He had been crying a lot. He spent half his days wanting to cry. He spent the other half in a state so numb that he felt as if he was watching it from a distance. It was like he was watching it on TV and he could see and hear everything, he just couldn't opperate his body. He read online his body did that to protect itself from the pain. Great! He was even a pain to himself! He really did hurt everyone.

Eric wanted his brother. He wanted Chuck. Chuck would make it okay. Chuck would help him. But how could he call Chuck. Not after what he had known to Chuck. Chuck probally wanted nothing to do with him. And Eric couldn't blame him. He didn't deserve Chuck.

Eric's crying increased and he went to pick up a knife from the kitchen. No one was home. No one would see. Eric sliced across his arm and a wave of happiness went through him. He read it was because of eundorphins. That's what was making him so happy. Eric thought that was stupid. To him, he was cutting little holes in his skin to let the pain out. When he was in pain, it gave him something physical to focus on. When he was feeling numb, it shocked him out of the numbness. It kept him sane.

Unfortunatly for Eric, not every servant in the penthouse could be bought.

"Mr. Chuck. This is Vanya. You must come to the van der Woodsen penthouse immediately. It's Mr. Eric. You were right about what you said. Mr. Eric was lying."

 **Author's Note: This was my weak attempt at some angst before that drama. Tell me how it went. REVIEW!**

 **-Lydia**


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gossip Girl**

Four Little Words Can End It All

Chuck ran. Ran out of his penthouse. Ran out of the building. Ran into and out of his limo. Ran into the building and past Vanya who gave him a grateful smile. Ran into the elevator. Ran up the stair and to Eric's room. Chuck opened the door to find Eric laying on his bed, staring blankly at a piece of math homework. Eric had changed out of his school uniform as most St. Judes boys did after school. However, Chuck was slightly puzzled as to Eric's choice of wardrobe. He had changed into a pair of pj pants and an over-sized sweatshirt, definitely not the usual choice of clothing for the Upper East Side. Plus, it was only four in the afternoon. Something was up.

Eric looked up when he heard the door open and was shocked to see Chuck standing before him. Eric subconsciously tugged his sleeves down, a small motion that did not go unnoticed by his brother. Worried, Eric shot Chuck a look that hopefully told him to go away and that everything was all right. Unfortunately for Eric, he was nowhere near that lucky.

"Eric," Chuck said cautionary, "What's going on?" Chuck glanced around the room, which looked a touch too neat in his opinion.

"You tell me," Eric said, fixing his brother a glare, as if daring him to continue, "You're the one who came bursting into my room." Eric hoped if he acted annoyed enough, Chuck might just follow Dan's lead and leave him alone.

"What's wrong, E?" Chuck asked gently, he knew no one was home. This could be his chance at some answers.

"There's always something wrong with me!" Eric spat, looking up at his brother, "Nothing's changed. Every think maybe this is how I always am and you were to self-absorbed to notice?"

He sat on the younger boy's bed and looked at him. "There's nothing wrong with you, Eric. There's obviously something wrong going on in you life though. And I want to help. But I can't help unless you let me," Chuck begged. He just wanted Eric to talk to him so he could help.

Eric struggled to put it into words. "There's nothing wrong with my life. My life is perfect." Eric had a false smile on his face when he said that. "I have everything. It's me Chuck. There's something wrong with me. It's obviously not because my life's been so hard. So it must be me." Eric said all of this simply. As though it was fact.

"It's not you," Chuck said firmly, "You are a wonderful person. Something bad just happened to you. Why can't you tell me what it is?"

"It's me. Chuck, there's something wrong with me. Normal people don't go through this," Erich sighed, "Dan was right. I am a horrible person."

Chuck froze,"What? Dan said that to you?"

The change in Chuck's tone worried Eric. "He was just telling the truth, Chuck," Eric hastily explained. He didn't want to get Chuck mad at Dan. After all, Dan was right. He didn't need to hurt anyone else.

Chuck got angrier at that. He couldn't believe Dan would say something to hurt Eric. Especially after what Chuck had told him. And Eric talked about it like it was completely normal. "No, he wasn't! I don't know what possessed him to say that, but don't believe him for a second. Don't you dare," Chuck said, furious.

Eric shook his head sadly, as though Chuck was a foolish person who just didn't understand, "He's right. I know you want to help me. And I love you for it. I really do. But don't you get it? It's too late. I'm to fucked up."

Chuck grabbed Eric by the shoulders and started shaking him."Shut up, Eric! Don't you dare say that ever again! Dan is an idiot! There is nothing wrong with you," Chuck's voice softened and he let his brother go, "Let me in, Eric. Just let me in. Let me help. I love you so much, E."

Eric broke down and started to cry, "I can't, Chuck! I'm hurting you! Dan's right! I hurt everything I touch!"

Chuck's heart broke. How could Eric think he was hurting him. Eric had never hurt anyone. He was there for everyone when they needed him and never asked for anything in return. "No you don't. I love you. I'd do anything for you. You're my little brother. I'll take care of you as long as you'll let me. Hell, I'll take care of you even if you won't let me."

"You shouldn't have to make sacrifices for me!" Eric said, angry, "I've hurt everyone. Serena, Jenny, Dan, my dad, my mom, and you." Eric shook his head, "I've gotta stop."

Chuck froze, "Eric, what are you talking about."

Eric just kept shaking his head over and over. It was almost as if he didn't even see Chuck. "I've gotta stop. I'll destroy everything. Everyone. I'll be all alone again. It'll never end unless I end it. I gotta end it.

Eric got up and made his way to the door, as if in a daze, then took off at a run. Chuck took off right after his brother, terrified at the thought of what Eric might be about to do. Chuck raced after Eric, but fell as he reached the stairs. Cursing, Chuck got up and ignored the throbbing pain in his ankle. Just as Eric got to the elevator and pressed the button, Chuck caught up behind him and grabbed him around the waist and pulled him back. Eric fought back. He fought Chuck like he had never fought for anything in his life. Harder than when he fought Nate, and even though Chuck didn't quite have his best friend's strength, he fought with everything he had. He was fighting for his brother's life, he feared. Eric yelled so loud if Vanya hadn't been on duty, security would have been called. Eric hit, scratched and kicked Chuck, but Chuck would not let go.

All of a sudden, the fight seemed to go out of Eric. At first, Chuck did not let Eric go, fearing it might be a trick to get him to do just that. Then, Eric screamed. He wasn't screaming like he had before when Chuck held him. He screamed like his body was on fire. He fought harder than he had before, screaming like he was dying. Then, Eric let go.

Eric started to cry, "Oh my god! It hurts! It hurts, Chuck! The pain! It won't go away! Why won't it go away?"

Chuck carried Eric over to the couch and held onto him tightly, fearing if he let go for a second, he might loose his little brother. "Its okay, Eric," Chuck soothed, "Its going to be okay."

"Make it go away! I can't take it anymore! It hurts!" Eric cried.

"I know, E. I'm gonna make it," Chuck promised.

Then Chuck heard something that made him freeze. "I want to die."


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: Don't own Gossip Girl. Just in case some of you live under a rock and thought I did.**

Just When You Thought It Was Over

"Eric. E. What are you talking about?" Chuck started to shake the boy on his lap, trying to get a reaction. It seemed to shock Eric out of whatever trance he was in. Eric pulled himself out of Chuck's arms and got off the couch.

"Nothing," Eric shook his head and smiled, as if that could erase his last words from Chuck's head. "I don't know what I was talking about."

Chuck got off the couch and walked over to his brother. "Eric, you just said you wanted to die."

"Yeah. Sorry about that," Eric fake laughed, turing away so Chuck could not see his face. "Total drama queen moment."

Chuck put his finger under Eric's chin and gently made him face him. "You weren't kidding Eric. I saw you."

Eric pulled away from his brother's touch. "You don't know what you saw."

"Yes I do," Chuck coaxed, "Eric, you need help."

"Do you really think anyone will believe you. Just look at the past few weeks. No one believes you," Eric threatened.

Chuck had had it with Eric's threats. He did not want to hurt his little brother, but the only alternative it seemed was letting Eric hurt himself. Eric was the one person he swore to never hurt, but Eric did not seem to realize that Chuck's threats were real. "Eric, do you really not remember who I am? I'm Chuck Bass. I control all of New York. If I want to get you to a doctor I can. Only to easily."

"You wouldn't mess with me," Eric scoffed, "You never have, and I'm sure you're not about to start."

Clearly, Eric underestimated him. "If I have to destroy you to keep you alive, I will. Don't challenge me."

"I'm not gonna die!" He yelled.

"You just said you wanted to. And we both know it's not an empty threat." Eric winced remembering his previous suicide attempt.

"I was being over dramatic!" he tried to defend.

Chuck lost it. "For god's sake! I know you weren't!"

"Yes I was!" Eric denied again.

"You're lying. Just like you were lying about cutting up your arm." Chuck grabbed Eric's arm and this time he did not pull away. Chuck slowly pulled back Eric's sleeve baring the cuts. Eric was looking anywhere but at his mutilated arm.

"Look at your arm, E," Chuck ordered. Eric looked pointedly in the other direction. Chuck's grip on Eric's arm tightened, digging his nails into his brother's arm. It would leave a mark, but the mark would be nothing compared to the damage already done to his fragile looking arm. "Look, Eric!"

Eric slowly looked at his arm. It looked worse in the bright lights than it did under his dim bathroom lights. He brought his eyes up to meet Chuck's. "Fine. I have a problem. I know that."

Chuck visibly relaxed. "I'm glad to hear you admit it. Don't worry, Eric. We'll get you help. I promise to stay with you the whole way. I'm going to call Lily and the three of us can sit down and talk about this."

"We're not telling my mom!" Eric was frantic again.

"Eric, she's your mother," Chuck tried to reason, "We need to get you help and your going to need her." Chuck did not understand why Eric was against telling Lily. Lily had always been there and been supportive for him and he was the bad one.

"You know how she is! She's going to try and send me back to Ostroff!"

Chuck hesitated, looking for the right words. "I hate to say it, E, but maybe that's where you need to be."

"What? No! Chuck, don't!" Eric begged, "Please! I'll do anything else. I'll see someone! I won't do it again! Please, don't tell!"

Chuck shook his head. "I love you. But I don't believe you!"

"You don't understand!" Eric pleaded, trying to make his brother understand. "She's going to send me back and this time she'll never let me out! I'll be trapped there for the rest of my life!"

"Eric, I'm doing this to help you, not have you locked away." Chuck wanted Eric to understand. Chuck knew there was not a good chance that Eric would understand, at least now. But he wished Eric would just go willingly, so he did not have to force Chuck knew he would do it if he had to without a second thought.

"I swear to God, Chuck. I will kill myself before I go back," Eric threatened, immediately regretting his word chose.

This time Chuck did not even display a reaction. "I'm calling your mother." Chuck gave up trying to reason with him. Eric was not going to go willingly, no matter what Chuck said, so Chuck would have to make him. Chuck reached into his pocket to pull out his phone and realized it was not there. He must have left it at home in his rush to get to Eric. He went over to the home phone instead.

"No! Wait!" Eric begged, "I was kidding! It was a figure of speech!"

Chuck just shook head and started to dial. "That was just the second time you threatened to kill yourself in the past fifteen minutes. I'm not going to let there be a third."

Eric gave up. "Okay, fine. Call my mom. Can I go to my room and take a nap while we wait for her? I'm tired."

Chuck eyed his brother. The younger boy looked both mentally and physically exhausted and he knew that for what was coming next his brother would need all of his strength. But he was loathe to leave Eric alone for long"Alright, E. I'm going to call your mom and I will be in to check on you in five minutes. I expect you to be asleep in your bed when I get there," Chuck warned

"Okay," Eric agreed a little too easily. Eric turned to go back to his room but Chuck put a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

"I know you're mad at me. And that's okay. I would be too. But remember, I'm just doing this because I love you and I'm worried about you. I don't want you to die. I don't want you to keep hurting yourself. It's going to be okay. I promise." Eric just nodded and left the room.

Instead of going to his room like he promised Chuck he waited in the hallway until he heard Chuck start to talk on the phone. Once he heard Chuck arguing with his mother, he knew he was in the clear. His mother would make the conversation take a while he was sure. Lily van der Woodsen was in denial when it came to the problems of her children. But just to be safe and buy himself some more time he pulled out Chuck's phone, which he had managed to slip out of Chuck's pocket unnoticed.

 _I should have known a nobody from Brooklyn would be easy to defeat. First your sister, then then you're little step-brother, now you. You three should have never challenged me. Be afraid._


End file.
